MEN WHO DREAM

I've never really understood whether God chooses men who dream or if He gives dreams to the men He chooses. I do know that much of what has been done for the glory of God was born of dreams.” ---Ron Boutwell, 1978

Thursday, October 11, 2012

DARKEST BEFORE THE DAWN #5

(From my column “Looking Forward and Glancing Back” in the SGT monthly newsletter, November, 1986.  Bracketed information has been added.)


Pat Edmonds and Terry Beasley
Everyone has heard it said, “It is always darkest just before the dawn.”  At Stained Glass Theatre, that period of complete darkness came as we finished our second season.  We had hoped that with Terry Beasley on our staff, we could turn things around.  Terry, our new warrior, hit the ground running and must have scared Satan, for he began to heat up the battle.  Satan’s big “new weapon” (to us anyway) was serious internal dissension:  hurt feelings, misunderstandings, and bitterness.  It was powerful and it took us completely by surprise; we did not even know how to deal with it. For a few horrifying days, it seemed as if Satan had defeated us.  Then, as before, God stepped in and worked a miracle.  He brought healing and opened our hearts to fill them with understanding and forgiveness.  Only then could we see the real enemy:  Satan.  Through God’s grace and love, we survived a nearly fatal blow, and we were unified with the resolution that if we ever folded, we would at least go down together.

We completed the second season in July.  By this time, we were over $1800 in debt, in addition to a $2000 bank loan.  We were far behind on salaries, and Pat decided he must work outside the Theatre.  (The foolish boy thought he and his new wife needed to eat.)  Facing two months of down time between seasons, with rent, utilities, and loans to be paid, salaries to be met, and no income except about $175 in monthly pledges and a few travel company bookings, it looked as if we had come to the end.  All around was darkness.  We couldn’t even see the proverbial “light at the end of the tunnel.”  We were weighted down with despair and defeat.

On an afternoon in July, Pat, Terry and I met in my back yard to decide the fate of Stained Glass Theatre.  The time had come to either make plans for the third season or give up and quit.  Honestly, giving up seemed like the best option.  It didn’t seem logical to keep going against such odds.  Yet deep within me, something—God, I’m sure—kept saying, “Hold on!  Hold on!”  After hours of discussing, we finally voted to go for the third season.  Out of desperation, we decided to increase the number of plays per season from three to seven, feeling that this might be the key to turn everything around.  We knew that it would either work, or it would kill us.

After our backyard planning meeting, I was hanging on physically, but spiritually and emotionally I was defeated.  My mouth said “yes” to a third season, but my heart said “no.”  I felt all was lost, and I kept asking, “Why go on if no one cares or attends?”  Even some of my best friends had never seen a show at SGT, which led me to believe that even they didn’t care.  Yes, I was having a real “pity party.”  I was weary, defeated, and hurt.  It was during this time of personal struggle that God began to move in the spiritual side of my life.  Looking back, I know God was preparing to break me spiritually.  And that would dramatically change both my life and the direction of the theatre.

Two weeks later, with negative feelings still in my head, I went to Houston, Texas, to participate in a national Christian theatre conference sponsored by the After Dinner Players.  It was there that God worked another miracle in SGT’s history.  The Lord brought me to my knees, shook me up, and filled me with the power of the Holy Spirit by working through the spirit of Jeannette Clift George, the founder and director of the A.D. Players In Mrs. George, I could feel the love of Jesus.  I saw in her the Spirit-filled leader that I should be.  Through Jeannette, God spoke to me and gave me an answer to my defeated heart.  She said, “Just as Jesus asked the fishermen to cast the net one more time, that is all He asks of us—to keep casting the net.  We don’t have to worry about the catch.  He will take care of the catch if we are obedient and keep casting the net.”  The words were so simple, yet so powerful.  God told me not to worry about the empty seats at SGT, but rather to simply keep doing what I was called to do.  I left the conference a new person:  filled with answers and with His Holy Spirit.

This experience may seem too personal to be included in the SGT story; however, the change the Lord made in my life has so directly affected the theatre that I felt it should be included [if people are] to fully understand the rest of the story.  Before that time, I had been walking and leading SGT with my natural self, trying to make it work with my own power.  Now, I am walking in the Spirit, relying on God’s power.  Praise the Lord for another miracle!  [Thank You, Father! Praise Your Holy Name! Jehovah!]

COMING NEXT: OUR FIRST HOME OF OUR OWN                
We move again and experience yet another great miracle.